Dating Tips
I came across this concept in a book some time back and then more recently someone sent me an email with the same content which had been taught at a school. It demonstrates what is happening in some sections of the Christian community and gives us cause for concern when young people endorse these practices. What am I talking about – some questionable new age techniques or dabbling with the occult? No, it’s some guidelines for young women and men as to their behavior when spending time with each other in groups and as dating couples.
The rationale for these suggestions comes from an interpretation of Creation which teaches that because Adam was made first he was to be the leader and initiator and that God made Eve to be Adam’s helper in the tasks which God had given him. This then defines what is feminine and what is masculine and the fixed roles these descriptions portray.
Young men are encouraged to practice their servant leadership and always take the initiative in deciding where to go and what to do. Even in conversations the men are told to direct the ideas and speak first, albeit considerately. They are also urged to be the spiritual leader in the relationship in preparation for being the spiritual leader of the home. To be fair, it is also stressed that the men are to be considerate, protective and respectful. So, you can see where this is going in respect to how the young women are expected to behave! They are told they should make room for the guys to practice their servant leadership as ‘a woman’s biggest temptation is to take control.’ This means stepping back and letting the man lead because that is how she can ‘practice for the time when she will follow a husband.’ In conversations it is deemed to be better to have awkward silences than for a woman to speak first.
Teaching like this, which describes masculinity and femininity by such detailed actions and attitudes, is having a marked impact on the current Christian scene. Have others come across this sort of thing, and why do you think some young people are finding it attractive? Obviously I have my own opinion but I’m sure we would all like to read some discussion on this disturbing trend.
